Healthy Divorce: How to Make Your Split as Smooth as Possible
Did you know that divorces are quite a common occurrence in the modern world? However, that doesn’t mean that they are simple and easy. Each relationship may end differently, which is why each divorce is difficult in its own way. How can you get divorced healthily?
Even though there is no such thing as a pain-free and easy divorce, you can make it as smooth as possible minimising the negative consequences for you and your ex-partner. Check out these tips that will help you split as smoothly as possible and get over the rough period of your life.
Ensure this is the best option
Having second thoughts about divorce is normal. Splitting with someone you’ve spent a lot of time with isn’t easy, but it may be the best option for both of you. If you feel like the endless talks aren’t taking your relationship anywhere, the divorce may be one of the ways out of such an uncomfortable situation.
However, make sure that the decision is final. Divorces are permanent. Only you and your ex can make that decision. Even though friends and family may push you to end things quickly, set your own pace. Some people would like to go through all the possible options to save their marriage, so don’t rush the decision.
Collaboration, mediation and conversation
It’s commonly known that divorces cause a flood of emotions that may overwhelm you. So, before you decide to take the process to the courtroom, take time for collaboration, mediation and conversation, before you make a rushed decision. Mediation is a calm and simple way to end things without spending additional time and money.
Did you know that people who separated through mediation express better emotional satisfaction? Even though calmly talking to your ex-partner can be challenging, conversation and collaboration take you one step closer to a healthier divorce. But this is not the only option. If your soon-to-be-ex isn’t trustworthy and reliable, consider other options as well.
Maintain mutual respect
One of the hardest things during the divorce is maintaining mutual respect. Depending on the circumstances of your splitting, levels of respect may vary. However, if you have children together and shared property, remaining civil will ease the process and make the divorce healthier for everyone.
As this process is far from pleasant for both sides, try to be respectful to each other, if possible. Engage in finding a shared vision or a goal that will keep you focused until the process is over. On top of that, you should never talk badly about your ex-spouse, especially to your children. Teach them to respect both of you no matter how the divorce ends.
Change your perspective
Rarely anyone enjoys the process of divorce. One, or both sides, are usually hurt and are facing a mix of negative emotions that can affect their wellbeing. Depression, anxiety, stress, anger, and uncertainty are some of the most common feelings people are facing. However, we tend to overlook the other perspective.
Does divorce have a bright side? Certainly! It’s better to be single than in a relationship that isn’t working out. On top of that, you’ll now have more time to indulge in your hobbies and rediscover your interests. Plus, you won’t be tied to a person who wasn’t a true match for you. Even though facing some of these things is difficult, getting out of a relationship where you felt unloved or disrespected is better than staying in one.
Help your kids
Just like it’s stressful to you, divorce can be severely traumatic for children. However, that doesn’t mean that you should stay in an unhealthy marriage. In fact, most children adjust to new circumstances within two years. Therefore, paying additional attention to your kids may be necessary during these rough times.
To help your children through divorce try working as a team with your ex-spouse. Come up with a plan on how to tell them and keep the communication open. Don’t forget to emphasize that both of you still love them and that it’s not their fault in any way. Also, be open to possible questions and emotional outbursts.
Consult a lawyer
Whether the divorce process is going smoothly or not, having a lawyer by your side is a smart decision. If you don’t want to face the divorce alone, having a professional help you deal with possible issues is a fantastic idea. So, what kind of lawyers should you look for?
Only professional family lawyers can help you with different matters regarding your divorce. They can provide you with experienced advice and a wide range of information on how to handle different procedures. On top of that, they can be there to assist you with property settlements and child custody, and ensure you get the best deal possible. Lastly, experienced family lawyers can help you if this case ends up in court.
Take care of yourself
As divorce can be an upsetting and stressful period, you mustn’t neglect yourself in the process. It’s quite easy to develop depression or any similar mental health issue that will certainly impact the quality of your life. So, you need to take time to practice self-care whenever possible if you want to maintain your wellbeing.
To care for yourself during and after divorce spend time alone or with dear people. Family, friends and children can provide you comfort and take your mind off the stress for a while. If necessary, seek help from a local psychologist who can help you deal with your emotions and handle this divorce like a champ!
Conclusion
Even though divorces are stressful and traumatic for many people if you’re able to reach an agreement with your partner the process will go smoothly. Try to communicate and collaborate during the divorce process to make things easier for both sides.
Don’t forget to be compassionate. Mutual respect and sympathy are essential for a simpler process. Keep in mind that a healthy divorce is easier to get over. You’ll be ready to get back on your feet in no time!
